3 years

3 years ago Ryan and I went on our first date. 

Fancy that. 

Our "anniversary" is the day before I see his face again. 

Here's how I'm feeling right now: 

Seriously, it's so surreal. 

I couldn't sit still in church today. I had to get up and just pace the halls. I probably looked like that crazy lady that tries to find someone to talk to in the halls so she doesn't have to go to sunday school. Except I avoided talking to people. I avoided eye contact. 

I just paced. 

I have a feeling tomorrow will be a lot the same. As busy as I'm trying to keep myself, I'm finding it hard to think of anything else. 

But I do like this quote: 

‎" I plead with you not to dwell on days now gone nor to yearn vainly for yesterdays, however good those yesterdays may have been. The past is to be learned from but not lived in. We look back to claim the embers from glowing experiences but not the ashes. And when we have learned what we need to learn and have brought with us the best that we have experienced, then we look ahead and remember that faith is always pointed toward the future. Faith always has to do with blessings and truths and events that will yet be 

efficacious in our lives." - Elder Jeffrey R. Holland

I wish someone could just tell me things were going to be great. 

But nobody can. 

So I'm going to pop a couple tylenol PM and pray I sleep in until noon. 

XOXO