Mr. Wall

Dear Mr. Bright Red Wall across from my bed,

It's been a while since we've seen eachother. I've missed your intense color and windows with the view of the lake. I bet you've been cold, mom and dad turn the heat off upstairs when I'm gone. I bet you're glad I'm back.

I'm glad too.

Do you remember the last time you saw me in August?

It's ok, I can't really remember either. But I can tell you that I was more than likely sprawled out on my bed, crying my little heart out, wondering how I was possibly going to make it through these next couple days, months, years.

*******

It' s cool. It's cool to be at where I'm at, 6 months later. Yeah yeah, I know, thanks for rubbing it in, Mr. Bright Red Wall, I know I've still got a long ways to go. But I kind of wanted to let you know how I'm feeling right now so that in another 6 months I can compare, learn, and continue to grow.
Do I look any taller? Because this experience has stretched me in every direction. It's not comfortable. I'm not necessarily enjoying being stretched. It hurts and it's tedious. But it must be done.

Let me catch you up on what I've learned through all of this "stretching." I know you're dying to know.

*******

1) Life is about trusting our feelings and taking chances.

2) Other people want to write your story for you. And if you listen to them, they will.

3) True love isn't about getting back, or punishing the other half for a mistake they've made. It's about loving unconditionally. Supporting when you'd rather be punching. Understanding when you'd rather get even. Letting them learn along with you and being patient while they do. The kind of love I'm talking about pushes, struggles, pulls, gets tangled, but never, ever, ever, ever, ever breaks apart.

4) Giving people the benefit of the doubt is a good thing. And a hard thing for me.

5) Food is fun, homework is necessary, sleep feels good, but people matter most.

There's just a brief list for ya Mr. Bright Red Wall. I know, a big part of what I learned was about love. But dang, out of all the silly classes I took and all the studying I did, I learned the most important fact of all: that I can.

And I am.

*******

Merry Christmas Mr. Bright Red Wall (and anyone else who may be reading this...aka 2 people).

Smile one for me.

Whitney

PS) Should I go private? Thinking about it.